What would you do?

After the Day of the Dead ceremony, which is in my mind very beautiful, I had a conversation with a friend about how it’s so uplifting and sad at the same time. That is true. In everything there is two sides, yin and yang, good and bad, yes and no. I put a post out a few weeks ago about “What would Mikey do.”  Now I’m taking a line from one of his songs which is “If you only had an hour left would you spend that hour saying an hour isn’t enough?”  Ever since Mikey saw his uncle in the hospital when Mikey was about 8 we talked a lot about knowing you only had a short time left in this world. Him and I had lots of talks about what we would ask for in that hour and the answers would change a bit depending on how old he was and what was going on in life at the time. When Mikey was young he would say to say bye to those he loved, when he was a teen it still was say good bye but also that those left would be alright, when he became an adult it was more about being able to see that the world would be better (not without him just in general). For me before Mikey passed I too had some of the same thoughts on what I would do with that hour. I would want to know my family is alright, the world would be moving towards better and that I did all I could to help those I came across. Mikey would always tell me to stop being nice/giving/helpful/naive/helpless syndrome  put what ever word that you would use to describe someone who still does for others no matter what has happened to them. Even in august before he passed we went to dinner at one of our favorite places DeGidio’s and he was still telling me I’m too nice, give some to much, and sometimes that is harmful or I go without just so others can have something. He was just trying to get me to put myself first, to make my happiness a priority, and to say no more than I do. It’s weird now when I do put my wants first, people freak. I was talking with a friend last week about how when I’m having a hard time, bad day, sad or things are overwhelming and I lash out, like by the way all of us do sometimes, people freak. He said it’s because you’re like the president. Then he went on to explain that like the president we don’t want to know the ones we look up to are human and get sick, get sad, get overwhelmed. He made me laugh because as he and others know I never wanted to be president just the ruler of the world. I do understand beyond most that Mikey was able to put everyone at ease, take up all the slack, spend days even weeks fixing what was brought to him. I wonder if he had been given an hour what he would of wanted to see, do or tell us.

A little now about the up coming event Big Shots I hope as many of you come as possible. This will be the last event for a couple of years that I do. Next year I will put my energy into a couple of Mikey’s music projects. So this event will not only pay for itself but any other money will go to the music projects. As many of you know Big Shots is off First Born and I’m sure you all know it was written a couple years before. If you saw them in the early days you have heard it. I’ve even seen video of Slug doing the hype or back ups. Well the story is about being in high school with all the different clicks, groups, ins and outs of what we all went through, are going through or will go through. Funny how as much as time/technology/wheel change somethings stay the same. So high school has been, will be about finding our way, fitting in, and just getting through. It will be a show in the form of vaudeville because Mikey was not just Hip Hop. We have music of course but there will be a bit of acting, possibly video, cipher, freestyle, and a few surprises. Now how the day will go is anyones guess. We have a outline and will run as close to that as we can. But then again it’s about finding our way, stretching our minds and limits. So what I can say is that when you come, come ready to laugh, cry, smile, frown, but most of all I hope you enjoy. Mikey had a unique way of understanding the struggles that are human and high school is a big part of that struggle.

I am deeply grateful to those of you who started this event, those of you who are finishing it, and those who will come see it. Also those of you who have donated but are to far to come, you’ll be missed.

Love

Kathy